Bila nak siap?!....

My house have been under "seized" by the contractors for the last one and half months....the initial agremeent was '40 working days'by then renovations akan siap, well I may be poor with my maths but I can still count. My counts went on more than 5 times on my hands, it has definitely exceeded the 40 days period....the house is only 80% completed...thats alot you may say....tapi banyak lagi kerja lain yang tak siap lagi, macam to my dismay...my kitchen is still in a mess.The quotation pun berubah dua kali, hmm,asyik naik aje...argh...argh!I snapped at my contractor bila he said.."kak pintu cabinet dapur, kita baru tempah, ambil masa 2 atau tiga minggu nak siap, pintu bilik air pun sama, kena tempah ikut saiz....almari cabinet yang sedia ada tak boleh pindah lagi, tunggu pasang cabinet baru dulu....dalam pertengahan bulan Januari baru siap cabinet".....Well, that was the last straw that broke the camel's back...apa lagi, I pun berleter sikit and voiced out my frustration....and naik ke bilik cos tak boleh tengok muka dia.Tapi, the good side of me, smsed him later in the evening...minta maaf cos "mood kakak kurang sikit"..

Kerja-kerja renovation ni memang rimas....the noise tu quite bearable jugak walaupun loud...adik selalu menjerit kat the pekerja sambil cekak pinggang..."DIAM, DIAM, jangan bising la adik tak suka!"...hehe...cute adik.Tapi yang tak tahan is the endless habuk....as you know, kakak and I ada asthma....it was very difficult to avoid from getting an asthma attack with all the habuks....kesian, tengok kakak...took the kids to see their pediatrician for some measure of precautions...dapat ubat untuk satu bulan...hmm....as I said earlier, dah terlebih sebulan......ubat dah habis makan.

Hubby was (still is) very helpful, nearly every night dia mop rumah...kadang-kadang kesian jugak, especially time tengah sibuk dengan kenduri kahwin aisyah, balik malam pun, dia mop jugak rumah. Masa tu, rumah lagi teruk...penuh dengan concrete yang pecah dalam rumah...nak masuk, kena jalan area living room yang ada concrete debris....Bila hubby and I tak boleh bercuti, hantar the kids to rumah Wa, at least kat rumah Wa, budak-budak rasa lega tak ada habuk and debris dalam rumah.We are grateful to Wa and Syahira dapat jaga the kids...adik suka sangat pi rumah Wa...kadang-kadang dia ajak pi rumah Wa during the weekends...I have to divert her attention by bawa dia jalan-jalan ke tempat lain...ya lah tak kan nak kacau Wa during the weekends pulak.

Anyway, back to the renovations, banyak lagi yang nak di siap, rimas bila kichen tak siap completely....we have been spending a lot on makan-makan kat luar...budak-budak tu pulak memiih nak makan macam-macam.I missed cooking....baru semalam, dapat buat fried rice...rasa lega dah dapat masak. Itu pun lepas they have installed the new sink, sink yang lama, masih belum dibuka, tak boleh pakai....kalau pakai sikit, air tersumbat cos ada residues of simen and pasir....hmm, the workers guna sink tu untuk basuh tangan, peralatan kerja...bla, bla, tu yang tersumbat. Ada a big baldi kat bawah sink untuk air tersumbat yang asyik menitik slowly....hmm, bila ada proper running water, baru la boleh buat kerja , kalau tak geli ....I hope they would remove the old sink soon...buka and buang aje...rimas and sakit mata tengok. Am trying so had not to stress myself...as it is, I dah demam tiga kali during this whole period.... Kak bought for me some herbal colon detox, although I dont have any control over my bowels during the detoxing period, but atleast I dont have any surprises.Like I always say, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade....

One has left the nest......

Alhamdulillah everthing went well last weekend. Siti Aisyah will now tick the Madam column instead of Miss.She has now entered the statistic figures for married women. I dont know whether she had the wedding of her dreams,but I hope she was not dissapointed with the whole wedding do.

I guess every little girls have dreamt of their wedding as early as the kahwin olok-olok scene. I dont remember having any specific dreams of how my wedding would be....infact, I dont remember any fuss was made by anyone...sobs!sobs! ....all I could really remember was that it was so difficult to cari the right wedding bed. I remembered pi window shopping dengan pak, mak and kak mah (masa tu, Pak tak berapa sihat....felt very bad Pak was dragged along)... punya la susah nak cari the right bed within the budget. At last kak mah yang jumpa(?) my katil..., kak mah did my kain cadar and langsir from scratch...I didnt pick the colours....it was picked for me....I basically didnt have say in the wedding ....hmm....nevertheless I am grateful with what I had.

Well, I am just glad that the whole shebang of organising a wedding is over....as Tam had said,one down and 32 more to go...hmm, the next wedding by the way is just around the corner, 6 months to be precised....hmmm. So it will be back to the drawing block and the organiser's clips...tapi tak apa, thats what family are for...to help each other...lebih ramai lagi seronok.Maybe the next wedding akan jadi lebih senang.

I received a thank you sms from the mother of the bride...it was a heartfelt thank you from kak chick....she thanked everyone in a very personal touch...it was very sweet. I hope that she is back to "normal" now....I hope the whole wedding scenario was a sweet memory for her....marrying off your first girl must have been a combination of relief and yet quite sad, Aisya is no longer hak mutlak the parents, sekarang dah tukar geran kat Ali....aisya priorty would be a wife first....

So, one has left the nest...thirty two to go....hmmmm

Hoping for the best.......

Last week,I nearly blew my top....while delivering my "kekecewaan" during a monthly meeting, I could actually hear my voice was trembling a bit against the silence of the whole office.Now I know macam mana rasa jadi boss, the sense of dissapointment was so great...I felt so let down by them.I felt so sad that my officers and staff let me down by not performing to their level best.I felt and knew that they could do better...but the dissapointment of facing the truth was much more greater.It was a bitter pill to swallow.

Sekarang, baru I realised I should have been more "sensitive" to my bosses bila dibuat teguran.They only had the interest of the organisation at heart.I dont know whether being a daughter of Pak Wan,the expectation of being a good leader is much more higher. Pak was such a good boss,leader and manager. I have heard and read great things about him.His former officers would always say that although he was very tegas but he was also a fair boss.He had the welfare of the staff in his heart.My heart would bloomed with pride bila dengar cerita about his execellent leadership.If I have a quarter of his leadership qualities, I would be very, very grateful and blessed.

Now that I am facing numerous problems with my officers and staff,I feel quite suffocated with the whole situation. I questioned myself regularly...can I face them with full determination or will I backed down with fear....Its quite a struggle to balance everything. I dont want to be a popular boss, I want to respected for having good qualities as a person not as a boss. At times, I am so burdened with the whole situation....I feel like screaming.....infact on one occasion I nearly did.The next best thing was to talk to my other half so I smsed hubby...telling him about it...and waited patiently for zuhor prayers so that I could calm down.....

Well, I am away from the office for 4 days....I hope there would be some changes after the last meeting...I hope I have drilled in some sense of awakening in their performance....lets hope so....