Not music to the ears

My conversation with an officer at M late in the evening, " Eh, Puan..ada lagi ke?". Ya Allah. The response was " Ya lah, kalau tak ada, saya tak jawab telefon". Duh!

My next conversation with a friend from HQ while driving back " I thought you called me up to tell me some good news..".

"Wei, I dont have any good news and I need some for myself, by the way, kalau I merana kat sini, I want my friends to share the same feelings" she said.

Hmm..I guess the grass is never greener no matter where you are.

Another piece of conversation two days ago with an idiotic person " So, bila puan boleh bagi ulasan puan..saya nak cepat ni". (He had been calling persistently in a kerek manner for the past 2 days, asking this and that..) So, my reply was " En. F...saya baru terima memo En. F..pagi ni, saya ada berbelas agreement atas meja saya ni (over pulak tu..) saya bukan buat kerja En F saja..saya akan jawab lepas waktu lunch".

The morale of this entry is- you cant pick and choose your conversations or the person you speak with.Period.

Less is more

My promise to myself from today is less talk. After all, verbosity is a vice. Less talk. To my dearest and closest, to my colleagues at work and friends, I am sorry.

Pain

So yesterday went by in a rather pained manner. Was not feeling well, had two meetings that were equally important. Managed to glide through the first without any injuries but some small cuts. Now the second was quite a headache..literally a headache. I really mean a headache.

I was nursing a bad headache, with a flu and eyes that were burning for the past 3 days. So, it was difficult to maintain a professional decorum while the elephants were doing some acrobatic stunts on my head and at the same time listening to this particular lady who was making my work and life in the context of this particular assignment a miserable one for the past 1 year. She has been harping her own ideas, her own principles, her needs and her wants without having a single decency to listen to others.

So I bit my tongue, sat there, listen to her going on and on. While listening, thoughts were going through my mind..such a pity, she does not realise that people finds her irrating, some might even loathe her..is she so self absorb that she does not realise that. Its a shame.

If for whatever reasons, I might turn into that person and oh please God forbids...I hope there would be some kind soul who has the decency to snap me out from it.

"Do what you can with what you have where you are"

If you say so..

I realised yesterday that I can be quite a stuck up. That I can be quite arrogant when I refused to accept the inevitable ups and downs of human behaviours. I realised that I do not like to waste my time over trivial things...do not like to be kept waiting, do not like to make eye contacts unnecessarily, I do not like people to think that I have all the time in the world to listen to them work wise, attention hoggers and plain self centered people.

When I get stucked in this situation and people.., I can be quite unpleasant as I will speak in crisped voice..clipped conversation...with a tad of annoyance attached to it.

So accept what you must, change what you can.

It's not okay.

Its not okay to be nonchalant about other people's feelings.Its not okay for you to not to take a minute to ponder on your mistakes. Its not okay to say things which cannot be retracted.

Its not okay to think that you are always right. Its not okay to expect respect.Its not okay.